The Biggest Boy

Now that our daughter Carly has left our home and will soon be getting married, Tom and I speak a lot about "the boys." Often we make a distinction--"the little boys"--because Bryce, our oldest son is twelve years older than Grayson and fifteen years older than Elijah. Bryce is further distinguished due to multiple disabilities. He is completely reliant on our care but is the peaceful heart of our home. The other boys love to climb into bed with Bryce and snuggle. Elijah often pulls onto Bryce's lap when he's sitting in his wheelchair. Elijah also likes to operate Bryce's hospital bed, lower or raising it when we need to get him in or out of his wheelchair. There have even been a few times I've found Bryce with his legs high up in the air thanks to his little brother! Yet Bryce loves their attention. He almost always looks directly at them and gives a big smile. The "little boys" have changed our lives, Bryce included.

Grayson the Eyeball Master

My four-year-old son's favorite word is "eyeball." It finds its way into every conversation: "What should we have for breakfast?" "Cereal and eyeballs!" "Old McDonald had an eyeball . . . ." "Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Eyeball!" (sigh) "Eyeball, who?"

Yet today I overheard a few things which gave me hope we're nearing the end of the eyeball stage. We had a new male nurse for Bryce. Grayson went to visit and asked the nurse, "Why did you call my mom ma'am? Her name is Darla." Also "My dad's name is Tom and my mom adores him!" Two minutes without an eyeball word. I need to capture a few utterances, though, before it leaves him forever. I asked Tom for a small digital recorder for Mother's Day so I can hold onto the sound of Grayson at four years, nine months because, honestly, I'll miss him.

The Look of Hand, Foot and Mouth Disease

Elijah and Grayson have both contracted the HFM virus (it's been making the rounds in Elijah's children's class at church). So far, Elijah has had it worse with a rash all over including down his throat. Grayson so far has just had a high temperature and hasn't wanted to eat. He has, however, taken many naps and been very cuddly . . . the only pleasant side effect I've noticed so far. My glass half full take? Just another childhood illness helping to create lifetime immunities for my little boys.

San Francisco Getaway

Tom and I spent last week in beautiful San Francisco. He worked during the day and I got to explore. I love San Francisco's food (of course), unique stores, mix of people, vistas, architecture and even the weather.

My mode of getting around varied from cable cars, muni buses and plain old hoofin' it so I was able to people watch. I found myself feeling fondly towards so many: the career girl who held a leather grip so she wouldn't have to touch the muni rail; the homeless man who kept bumping into me when the bus turned; the tourists from Brooklyn who stopped the cable car so they could take pictures of Lombard Street; the P.E. class having races on the crowded sidewalk. Very good for my soul to relax and enjoy others going about their everyday lives. I get so engrossed with my own world. It's nice to remember we're all here bumping around together, hopefully doing the best we can.

The Life We're Living

My husband and I often say this when things get crazy . . . "Well, this is the life we're living!" What does it mean? That we're in the thick of things, and we're in it together. That our children are a priority and often dictate what we can and can't do. That we'd better enjoy, because soon it will all be over.

Our lives are complicated and yet, somehow, elevated by our children. Our only daughter is nineteen years old and a great friend; our second son, sixteen, has severe disabilities; our four-year-old is hilarious and hyperactive; our 21-month-old is getting a little sassy and wants to quit wearing a diaper. They make us feel so young and so old at the same time.